"Now I'm Trying To Be A Good Father And A Good Husband"

👤 Anoymymous, Male, 37, Heterosexual

Illustration by Kantapon Metheekul


My sex life started pretty young. I was a curious boy. When I was seven, I liked to play “family” with my cousin who was 2 years older than me. I could say she was my first love and my first kiss. Role-playing only consisted of kisses and hugs like a family normally would. It was nothing more than that, but that made me become obsessed with sexual fantasies.

We grew apart for years. When we met again not so long ago, she still turned me on. If I wasn’t already married, there wouldn’t be any problems. Since I’m a married man, I cannot.* We still kissed and touched each other like we used to, but not to the point of having sex. This kind of relationship is impossible. Luckily we stopped ourselves before it went too far.


Kantapon Metheekul


Actually, I was always scared to approach a girl. I attended all-boy schools until sixteen. I never got laid. Every girl that I went after, they turned out to be lesbians. I failed every time, and I thought my looks were bad. My wife was the first person that loved me back. She was the first I could openly call my girlfriend. Eight months after we’ve been dating, we had our first and consensual sex in my house. We got married after our graduation.

We’ve been married for 12 years now with three kids. Friends say that I am a good husband. I want to go to places my male friends go although I never have. I’m afraid that my wife would be upset. And I don’t know why I should since my relationship is perfect. My wife loves me the way I am. Our love life is still good although we have sex just once or twice a month.

Must admit, there are a lot of fetishes I still want to try. I often dream about having sex with someone else. My female cousin is the one I meet in my dreams and we have very hot sex. She can fulfill every one of my fantasies. I feel like I’m a bad guy as I’m telling this story. But when I get home and see my loving wife, I hold her every day. She’s busy with the kids and I am her backup. I think we’ve had our wild times of our lives. Now I’m trying to be a good father and a good husband forever. 

* 5.6% of all sexual crimes in Thailand (as of 2014) are inflicted by relatives due to blurred ethical judgements on incest. It’s common to find Thai porns with titles that indicate incestuous taboos and relationships.